window-licking:

when your armpit just won’t shut up

image

(via smosh)

Anonymous asked:
What's the most illegal thing you ever did?

sephyerite:

almanzapedia:

At Stanford there was this Professor who was a total bitch and she taught British Literature, which was cool. Except she taught only her opinions of the books and it didn’t help me as a writer. I went to school to learn new things to improve my craft, not have someone else’s opinions carved onto my forehead.

So anyway, for our final project, she asked us to write a ten page paper on why the color symbolism in Othello was so significant. I did some research and it turned out that she did her entire graduate thesis on this very subject. I was mad. This wasn’t teaching, this was boosting her ego. SO I wrote a ten page essay on why color symbolism in Othello wasn’t significant, satirizing it to the point of no return, saying that her opinion was an opinion and shouldn’t be taken seriously.

SHe failed me, needless to say. So in retaliation, I responded by baking a batch of brownies laced with weed and laxatives and delivered them myself to the professor hours before her big graduation speech. I told her that it was a peace offering, my way of apologizing and asking if I could do anything to fix my grade.

She refused to fix my grade.

In the end, she shit herself on stage.

I didn’t regret it.

No mercy.

dogapult:

are we just gonna not talk about soulless black-eyed family emoji

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(via dontwreckthiskid)

niazkillem:

panic-at-the-royalball:

niazkillem:

harry is that kid that gets kicked with the ball in the face 2 seconds after the dodgeball game starts

Wouldn’t he just use magic to block the ball?

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(Source: stilezs, via bootlegcal)

daisycraze:

if i was famous i would just knock on peoples doors and be like hello yes its me

(Source: , via dontwreckthiskid)

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